My quest to watch every housewives franchise has brought me all the way to Cheshire. Join me as I dip my toes in across the pond, why don’t you?
My it’s been a busy gossip week. (Or maybe I’ve just been bored-refreshing my Google Now too much.)
A post in which my keyboard falls to pieces from typing out the tagline for each member of this eternal cast.
In this week’s Round-Up: is Bethenny leaving RHONY? Probably not. Is Kenya leaving RHOA? Probably. Is Jackie leaving the jungle? Oh, hunnies. Set your shine factor to maximum and click the link below.
Hell is other Housewives.
The Sun is reporting that Leanne Brown from The Real Housewives of Cheshire is calling time after six seasons (or, as the Brits call them, serieseseseseses). Leanne is one of the O.G.s of the franchise, so her departure, if true, will leave a gap, especially given her blood feud with former biffle Dawn Ward over a £500k loan. Sadly, her exit would also put a crimp in the Cheshire producers’ plan to assemble the first Real Housewives cast visible from space. Hopefully the seven women they hire to fill her slot are up to the job.
It’s New Year’s Eve, and you’re prettying up for a night on the town (unless you’re checking into rehab — stay strong, Countess!). But before you head out, put down that lip gloss and unplug your straightener, and focus on what’s really important: which of the 2017 iterations of The Real Housewives of Wherever the Fuck was the best. In fact, cancel your plans. This could take all night.
After a week of swirling rumours, Kerry Katona appears to have confirmed that she’s joining The Real Housewives of Cheshire. While nothing’s official yet, Kerry has used the immediate wake of her firing from Atomic Kitten (after a bitter feud with Natasha Hamilton) to move in with Ampika and make some vague Instagram posts about “starting the next chapter.” Sounds legit to us.
If you’re one of our many foreign readers to whom this impenetrable Brit babble means nothing: Kerry Katona is an original member of the pop group Atomic Kitten (“Whole Again” remains a jam) who’s more famous as a tabloid staple and perennial reality show contestant. She also partook in a series of disastrous off-the-wagon morning TV appearances and a couple of kicky frozen food ads. RHOCheshire is in every way the next logical step in her career.
With Kerry in the hopper and Ampika eying a return (The Secret works!), RHOCheshire is poised to shatter records as the first Housewives franchise with a 19-member cast.
After going on hiatus for series five, the Real Housewives of Cheshire reunion is back, instantly reminding us why we never missed it to start with. Here are five things we hated about the RHOCheshire reunion.
Cheshire puts its sixth series to bed with lots and lots and lots of moralizing. Oh, goody.