Is everyone ready to relive the epic tale of DeShawn Snow and Lisa Wu Hartwell???
You guys, it fucking pains me to type these words. I’ve been holding off on writing about Kenya for a while now – not because of my normal procrastination – but because I wanted this piece to end with her victory lap as she returned for another season against all odds. Sadly, it seems even Kenya Moore can push Bravo too far. Fingers crossed as soon as I hit post that a new report comes out and a peach is officially in her hand.
Some unexpected pairings, some unsurprising ones, some absurd Orange County shenanigans, and a whooole lotta bullshit about the Atlanta casting process.
In which nobody’s exactly on their best behavior.
Sure, it may feel like neither exists anymore now that the Bellinos are through, but carry on we must!
Because, like the late capitalism it so hyperrealistically depicts, this program inevitably sunders bonds, destroys traditional relationships, and spreads psychic and physical pain.
It’s a play on words, you see, for we have casting news, and we also wish Bethenny Frankel would be deposited at long last on a desert isle.
(The Housewife, not the country, though both contain multitudes.)
You are expected to expect the unexpected.
Take care of yourselves, Witches; if you don’t, you could wind up with fillers in your ears or poison in your breasts.