Ranked: The RHOBH Season 9 Taglines

This has felt like an eternal run-up to a season, well, probably because of its debut being delayed but still. Usually hearing anything about Beverly Hills makes me fill with dread and PTSD from the past 3 seasons. But, if this truly is the LVP takedown it’s being positioned as, perhaps it will be better?

7. Denise (“My problem with the tabloids? My real life is so much juicier.”)

I don’t really have much of an opinion on Denise pre-show. I think she’s a pretty normal lady who got sucked into the Charlie Sheen insanity and that’s not going to make for exciting tv. This tagline is about as boring as I predict her to be.

6. Erika (“Most people talk about their fantasies. I’m living mine.”)

Normally Erika whips out something better but this is a flop. She must be going for a low-key season.

5. Dorit (“In business and in life I wear many hats…and hairstyles.”)

This made me laugh a bit not because it’s particularly witty but Dorit doing anything makes me laugh a bit. Still not her best showing, though.

4. Kyle (“In Beverly Hills the truth always has a way of rising to the top.”)

This must be a first. Kyle’s tagline isn’t bottom of the barrel! Now it’s not a great tagline and follows her typical “In Beverly Hills…” structure but it gets major bonus points for being a jab at LVP.

3. Teddi (“I’m not afraid of hard work but I’ll never do your dirty work.”)

In a similar vein, I vehemently disagree with this tagline. I don’t believe hiring an army of interns to text people about what they ate is hard work. It is a very obvious pointed attack at LVP though so again, it rises above.

2. LVP (“You can stab me in the back but whilst you’re there, kiss my ass.”)

LVP usually has a great tagline game but I don’t love this one. It’s very reminiscent of Carole’s season 6 tagline about checking out her great ass, but LVP doesn’t have the tongue-in-cheekiness to pull it off. Or maybe I just hate her so much I can’t look from an unbiased lens. :shrug:

1. Lisa Rinna (“In the game of life, it’s Rinna take all.”)

Lisa Rinna has really become an indispensable housewife to me. Her social media is hilarious, she gives negative fucks about kowtowing to LVP, and of course the baby shower to end all baby showers. This is a great pun and makes me want to tune in to see if Rinna is back on form this season.

 

Stay tuned here for more discussion of RHOBH when I feel like it. Probably not weekly recaps unless it’s miraculously killer, but at least every few episodes!

3 thoughts on “Ranked: The RHOBH Season 9 Taglines

  1. I actually like Denise’s tagline, far better than Kyle’s repeat nonsense (even with the LVP dig).

    Dorit missed the mark but I appreciate the goofy nature she’s giving off.

    Lisa Vanderpump usually has more poise, restraint and subtlety in her taglines. To see her be so forwardly aggressive is unexpected, but not exciting enough.

    Lisa Rinna thankfully stole the show. She’s been consistently solid with taglines but feels like she’s in her apex now.

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