💫STAR SEARCH💫: The Real Housewives of Orange County, S13E14

I mean, it is The Shannon Show, but point taken, Gina.

Gina

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Orange County being what it is, we so rarely get a true voice of reason on this show (sit down Dubrow I wasn’t calling on you), so it was refreshing—even for a Shan-stan like me!—to see Gina spend the hour gawping in disbelief at the dozens of molehills Shannon dutifully transformed into mountains.

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐ – That was also one of the all-time best Shannon detonations ever. Yas bitch drag Tamra into this!!! Only good/deliciously nightmarish things could happen.

Kelly

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Kelly was a delightful supporting character this episode, mostly just jumping in now and then mid-argument to remind Shannon that um they have the same storyline this season so why are you freaking out this hard girl. As an added bonus she did it in her classic argument voice that’s been seared in my head since the Bus Ride from Hell. STAWW-AWWPPPPP!!!!!!

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐ – Kelly being both the wokest Housewife and the one most prone to putting on a Jamaican accent is a pleasure too.

Shannon

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One of the greatest villain performances of all time we are not worthy!!! (Although everyone on Reddit is apparently all “poor Shannon” because they hate Tamra that much hehe.) I loved every second of this booze-soaked disaster, from the potshots at Emily and Gina (in between insisting they’re good friends) to probably the sixtieth Shannon Beador meltdown in a restaurant bathroom to tearing off her microphone through her shirt to the climactic impromptu intervention in front of an electric fan. Note that when I call her a villain, I mean it in the best possible way; who among us hasn’t, in a paroxysm of alcohol and angst, started spiraling into a multi-front argument with all their friends at once? Just me? Hm.

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ – Lowkey moment I don’t want to get lost from this episode: Shannon hissing to Tamra that Gina doesn’t understand because she and her man are !!still fucking!!

Tamra

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If the first half of this season has seen the welcome return of Shit-Stirrer Tamra, this episode gave us a renewal of the delightful Screaming Demon Tamra. Would I love this falling out with Shannon less if I didn’t know from social media that they patch things up? Maybe, but who cares. More shouting across valet parking and hotel suites please.

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ – No one in the game says “FUCK YOOOOOU” like Tamra Judge. No one.

Vicki

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Seeing Vicki as the closest thing to a peacemaker in this episode was breathtaking (though I guess unsurprising in one of her damage control seasons), but fortunately was also merely prelude to her bringing up conwomangate because helllooo she’ll never get over it. And then we moved on to an extended debate about the state of her ass so good showing all around.

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ – Vicki Gunvalson get plastic surgery? Naaaaah.

Emily

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Oh yeah her.

Rating: ⭐ – Shannon taking a moment out of biting Gina’s head off to mock the very notion of “Fun Emily” was great tho.

7 thoughts on “💫STAR SEARCH💫: The Real Housewives of Orange County, S13E14

  1. Loved crazy distracted Shannon. “You know what kelly? You know what kelly?…You know what Tamra?!?”

    1. Flustered, stuttering Shannon is my favourite. Rewatch the 70s party when she went up to fetch David to fetch her and couldn’t even stutter out what happened. She also was losing it when she was stalking off to rip her mic off.

  2. LOVED this episode and I love that Shannon is going to pull a Peggy Sulahian and disappear for the rest of the trip. I wonder if she will record any babies crying in the meantime.

    Anyone who watched this thinking “poor Shannon”…uh what? I love Shannon but she’s a nightmare of a human and would be an exhausting friend. Sometimes you need to bitch about your friends and sometimes you need to scream in their face a la Tamra. Everyone acts like an asshole when their marriage is crumbling but that doesn’t mean they aren’t an asshole.

    Vicki was of course perfection.

  3. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a housewives episode so completely devoted to a single housewife’s meltdown. Halfway through the episode, I was positive that we wouldn’t get any footage beyond Shannon incoherently screaming at her friends. But I suppose even a pro like Shannon needs to recharge after such a glorious performance.

    My lowkey favorite moment was the editors rewriting history and turning Shannon into the badguy of the Shannon/Vicki/Brooks feud and using reunion footage of Shannon blowing off Vicki to further paint her as a bad friend!!!!!! WHAT! This really has been the best redemption season I’ve ever seen for a wife. Vicki is absolutely killing it. Cancer who?

  4. Hold your horses! Apparently Shannon isn’t speaking to both Tamra and Kelly now and the reunion is taping in 3 days so I think this will build to something bigger maybe. Kelly was posting on social media shit talking Shannon and talking about her gruesome twosome with Tamra. On a strategic level, Tamra really did end any budding Shannon-Kelly power alliance didn’t she?

    Also if this leaves Vicki as the last Shannon ally on the show holy shit <3

  5. as a person for whom shannon is the single most triggering housewife, i LOVED THIS EPISODE!!! i also love any time i get to hear vicki say the word cahnwoman so this really gave me everything i could have asked for from oc. watching gina launch what i hope will be a long and prosperous housewives career is a cool bonus too.

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