The Real Housewives of New York – Reunion Power Rankings Pt. 3

And that’s a wrap on season 10 of RHONY. Sadly, we bid adieu to Princess Radziwill. Thanks for making your last season a killer one.

7. Luann (-1)

I have admittedly yet to watch WWHL but that wouldn’t be included in this ranking anyway. Luann had a great season overall and became a real breakout thanks to her arrest. Her final part in this reunion though was a mention of her shit-stained Colombian mattress so she is ending up in de facto last place.

6. Bethenny (-5)

Yes, I’m serious about this. I will be the first to admit that I think both Carole and Bethenny have come off poorly but she was a goddamn nightmare during this segment and made a massive fool of herself. She did receive another assist from Andy this week. I don’t think there was a single moment Carole got to speak without her interrupting, and he corroborated Bethenny’s side with the Red Scarf Guy (RSG) texts even though the point was that they were sent days later. I have spent far too many hours reading comments on Reddit and Vulture about what a negative toxic person Drunk Dorinda is, but I can’t think of anyone who is meaner and more disgusting than Bethenny Frankel and it was on full display part three. Her constant smug smile as Carole tried to hold her accountable for shaming her codependence (yes Carole’s is the codependent one here, B 👀), her career, etc. I think Bethenny hit peak pathetic when she listed off her resume while Carole was trying to tell her she never discounted her accomplishments. Though I would never count myself a fan I have gone through times of liking Bethenny more (S 1-3, 8) and begrudgingly admitting her entertainment value, but I’m a little worried how much I loathe her at the end of this. I hope it doesn’t spoil future RHONY for me.

5. Tinsley (-1)

Poor, sweet Tinsley. Even though I understood what Carole was trying to point out about their friendship “narrative” it definitely was poorly worded and left Tinsley hurting. I also felt sad when she explained that she always says boat…turbulence? is fine because Topper would be embarrassed if she broke her frozen WASP exterior to show any worry. I guess Carole was right about her past abuse (or controlling partners, not sure if Topper was abusive) playing a part in it after all.

4. Dorinda (+3)

Dorindemption! Dorinda scored this week by not having to answer to much beyond her destruction of Sonja which I always enjoy and Sonja is constantly begging for. Her sweet moment with Bethenny was really what shot her up here from the bottom because it’s clear that Dorinda is someone that is hurting, grieving and probably drinks too much to numb the pain but she’s a good person at heart.

3. Sonja (+2)

Sonja Morgan is LEAVING the townhouse. Or is she? How have none of us heard about this? We all know she has Page Six on speed dial. I can’t recall a housewife ever getting a post-season package of brand new footage and confessionals but I guess Sonja is a trailblazer. As soon as she started describing her “new” apartment in Kenya Moore-esque generalities my spidey sense started tingling though. I follow Sonja on social media and I can’t think of a single IG story or post showing her in an apartment. She’s been traveling almost non-stop all summer. Thus, my assumption is possibly that Sonja Morgan is homeless. Anyway, regardless of my conspiracy theories she got a triumphant reunion package about finally moving on and getting full ask for her townhouse, so up to the top half she goes.

2. Ramona (+1)

Comic relief reunion Queen. I think this reunion segment really managed to balance the goofy lightheartedness along with the dark abyss that is the Carole/Bethenny conflict, and I mostly attribute that to Ramona. The stare that will live on in infamy. Standing up to punch a cramp out of her thigh when nobody was paying any attention to her. The description of her diarrhea falling out of her as she ran in Cartagena. The glorious fucking noodle flashback package. Bless you Ramona, you will always make me laugh. Since this was a renewal season, we also got to see Ramona reflect on the fact that she can be entitled and that she made an effort not to be with the room selection. Ramona is a good person! Take that, world.

1. Carole (+1)

Radzwill out on top. Let me first tackle the weak points as this was definitely not an entirely flawless finish. I think the fact that she even got sucked into arguing about RSG was embarrassing, her talking down about her friendship with Tinsley was not the best look, and she will forever be mocked for her large hippocampus by everyone on earth except for perhaps LeeAnne Large-Amygdala Locken. That being said, I think she managed to finally showcase a lot of Bethenny’s hypocrisy this round and caused Bethenny to really self-destruct more than anything. The observation that Bethenny was calmer than Carole is truly nuts to me because she literally had nothing to say beyond making mocking noises and crazy finger motions to counter any of Carole’s logic. The Basic Bitches might have watched and thought she won, but this site is not for those basics. I saw Carole destroy Bethenny once and for all for not supporting her friends/other women and for that I am grateful. Now let’s never speak of this fight again! You might not have remembered calling Andy full of shit, but us and the producers (thanks for that remarkable in-reunion flashback) always will.

 

Did you smoke a post-season cigarette after if was finally over and all the tension released? Do you agree that Carole finally shut down Bethenny? Weigh in in the comments.

16 thoughts on “The Real Housewives of New York – Reunion Power Rankings Pt. 3

  1. lol wow I love Carole… but she totally failed at this whole reunion, she looked pretty bad in each segment and aligning with Ramona and Dorinda didnt help matters.

    1. I thought she had a slam dunk win about her career vs. Bethenny. Bethenny looked awful listing off her resume, as she always does when she gets into her “I’m the only one who is successful” mode. I think they both lost out on the RSG thing because bickering over a man is embarrassing, especially one as thirsty as RSG.

      I’m obviously biased against Bethenny and happy to see the worst in her at all times and I think putting her up against Carole really let the ugly side out full force. She was nasty, cruel and petulant.

  2. I think the subject of Bethenny Frankel has gone beyond objective discussion at this point. I can’t imagine enjoying someone responding to any criticism with, essentially, the fuckin SpongeBob meme of repeating back whatever was just said, or smugly rattling off accomplishments to denigrate a supposed friend who has *reported from war zones,* or declaring that *she* gets to interrupt *every single thing you say* but God forbid you roll your eyes once while she’s talking, or triumphantly using the term BOOYAH! in the year of our Lord 2018. Yet people out there STILL eat this shit up! I truly don’t understand it. She’s not funny. She’s not nice. She’s not cool. She’s only circumstantially entertaining (because she’s surrounded by one of the most amazing television casts ever assembled, really). The Bethenny Frankel Experience, at this stage of history, is a failed project. Yet she remains the fan fave, coasting into Season 11. I guess this is how Trump got elected.

    1. Oh and yes I was screaming when Carole discussed her ENLARGED HIPPOCAMPUS. If LeeAnne ever leaves Dallas (lol I’d riot in the streets) she and Carole should open up a Brain Institute.

  3. To a certain group of people in New York, Bethenny won. In all fairness I feel like both her and Carole kind of lost in the end.

    The real question for TBW: Bethenny or LVP?

    1. Ooh that’s a tough one because I’m white-hot in my Bethenny hatred at the moment. But, she adds much more to her franchise than LVP.

      LVP is the impetus behind BH’s fall from greatness without doubt and I despise her every time she’s on my screen. I can hate Bethenny but respect that she brings entertainment of sorts. LVP brings boring, and that’s unforgivable.

      1. Bethenny at least brings ~it~ on camera….. whatever ~it~ may be and it’s usually something I don’t like but it’s something and she’s willing to fight on camera which are about my only positives for her rn.

        1. Yeah I mean at least she’s willing to appear on camera in a less than flattering light than LVP is nowadays. Or she just can’t rein it in as well as her.

          They both like to manipulate their presentation but RHONY is also a cast unwilling to let Bethenny get away with that shit and B is a bit too much of an emotional mess to pull it off flawlessly.

  4. I say this with 100% sincerity: In these dark times, I wish I lived in your Carole-stanning bubble. I agree that B is an asshole, but she’s consistently been an asshole from seasons one. Carole used to be my RHONY Greek chorus, but she’s suddenly calling out Bethenny for things she spent three seasons defending. It was gross, and Carole’s comments about not being close to Tinsley were especially telling. It’s possible to hate both Carole and B; they have more in common than they’d like to admit.

    1. Carole was at her worst with Bethenny. After loving Carole seasons 5-6, meh 7 she was awful in 8 and in 9 she was mostly B’s shadow following her out of parties. This season was a renaissance for me. Finally she saw what a toxic waste dump Bethenny is. Yes she was party to the same mean girl tactics Bethenny used and I don’t forget that. But, finally she was someone who could cut through Bethenny’s bullshit unlike Luann or Sonja or Ramona. And in the beginning, it was like that. When she was calling her out in the Berkshires it felt like we were in for something big.

      But I think Bethenny managed to suck her down into the petty bullshit. And I don’t discount Carole’s fault in all of this. She likes to be catty and can’t admit when she’s wrong. But she should have known better than to bicker over a bescarfed man or proclaim her alliance on camera at the reunion.

      I still can’t say “they were both equally bad” though. Like I’m still traumatized from the 2016 election. Nobody is perfect, but one person is a lot worse here. Maybe that’s excessive but Ger already brought up Trump so I’m here too lol. Neither one came out of this season looking great but I think one person was a particularly toxic gaslighting nightmare and I’m glad that even with a stellar reunion edit, she still came off looking the the miserable husk of a woman she is this time.

  5. I feel your pain, Tracey, because I was hoping that Carole and her sparkly socks would go out in a blaze of glorious, devastating parting shots. Instead, Smirky McSmuggins sat back and let her year-long gaslighting do a number on Carole’s psyche. It was the exact same M.O. as with Kelly at S2 reunion. Even now Carole is rage-Tweeting rebuttals about how she does have a career, Bethenny, and it’s like… sigh. She got bogged down in the petty details, like the stuff with RSG. And then she threw Tinsley’s friendship under a bus, and honestly, I would have been as hurt as Tinsley. It made Carole look cold and a friend-user. Meanwhile, Bethenny’s glee at Tinsley’s hurt has basically set the tone for Season 11. Skeletor is victorious and everybody is going to know about it. I really hope my girl Ramona’s dead eye re-asserts itself in time to speak truth unto power.

    To calm myself down, I have been re-watching RHONY season 5 and, boy, I really hope you do a season analysis of this unfairly-maligned season (that, and season 6!). It is LIFE-AFFIRMING lol. Seeing the early rules of combat set down by Jill Zarin and Ramona get turned on their head by cool, confident, wealthier newbies is a delight to behold — until at least St. Barts, when the OGs bite back and remind everybody why they, ultimately, rule in viewers’ hearts. Heather’s handling of Ramona was so perfect and elegant. Carole was charming and delightful — in the days before that mouth-breathing bore Adam and before she became haughty and mean-girlish. And there is no Bethenny to raise your blood pressure! Bonus!

    Also, unpopular opinion, but Reid Drescher was arguably the most devastatingly handsome husband of this franchise, maybe of all of them. Discuss.

    1. Yeah it’s been a rough season for non-B fans.

      Let it be known that I think seasons 4-6 sans-B (before I even really hated her) were fantastic and S7 where she returns is the weakest. S5 truly is forgotten often and I think St. Barts rivals Scary Island as far as the best RHONY trips ever go.

      I am a little worried about you though. Reid? I know it’s a traumatic time for some of us but don’t devolve into full-blown psychosis. I actually just tried to do a flash ranking in my head of the spouse attractiveness on RHONY and I can’t think of any I would consider hot besides maybe some of the one episode stands like Kelly and Sonja’s foreigners.

      1. Amazingly, I have put down the booze and am watching season 5 sotally tober!

        I can’t believe it myself, but honestly I can’t get over how fine looking he is on screen. But IA that none of the other NY husbands past and present have ever done it for me.

    2. There may or may not be a RHONY season ranking on the way and it may or may not highly appreciate the charms of season 4 through 6.

  6. Hurrah! I cannot wait. I must say between seasons 3-5, we got arguably the franchise’s three best trips: Scary Island, Morocco (Lu vs the camel!) and Pirates of St. Barts.

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