Highs and Lows: Life is a Cabaret – RHONY

And with that we wrap another season of RHONY, minus the reunion. And based on the previews it’ll be a doozy.

Highs:

1. Waitress Dorinda. This episode might not have been Dorinda’s best showcase but never forget that the woman can be charming. Her waitressing bit as she opened the champagne was very cute. She also looked amazing in that pantsuit with the blue eyeshadow.

2. One last pot-stirred. I really appreciated Carole spending her last RHONY episode stirring the pot gleefully. She was in there encouraging Tinsley to fill Dorinda in on Scott’s invite and even switched seats at the Cabaret so they could get it out right then, leaving Dorinda to tipsily fume through the entire show. Then at the after party she kept pushing her to speak to Luann which as we all saw, was definitely a very good idea. I’m going to miss you, Radziwill.

3. Dorinda scorned. Did Dorinda make a huge ass of herself? Yes. Am I offended by her behavior? No. Is this exactly why I watch this show? YES. I don’t care who is morally wrong or right I care who is giving me the entertainment and in this case it is both Dorinda and Luann so I’m on both of their teams. I think Lu 100% did Dorinda dirty by not inviting John and being pretty rude in her texts, but Dorinda as per usual went about 300 steps too far. All of those cuts to her in the audience absolutely steaming were hilarious. Her condescending compliments at the after party really cut to Lu’s core, so kudos to your Mrs. Medley. I hope John loaded up the viagra and gave you a nice hate fuck afterwards.

4. Hype woman. Talk about supporting other women. Ramona was like your mom screaming and hollering and dancing at your school performances if your mother was a hot lunatic. She’s exactly who you want to invite to your event to make sure the crowd vibes are high energy. Then again there is the human energy suck Bethenny, who was fine at the show but really was a sourpuss afterwards with Ramona who was definitely being very reasonable interrupting her conversation with Carole.

5. Luann domination. It’s honestly so, so odd for me to see Luann triumphant for once? There are so few seasons where she is not being constantly mocked for whatever absurdities she’s pushing. She rocked her cabaret (which looks awful aside from her musical hits, btw, sorry Rachel Dratch, et al.), had everyone gushing all over her, and looked even better in comparison to Dorinda’s behavior. Too bad this victory lap won’t be stretching into the reunion, a place where she has historically never won.

Lows:

1. War on Dorinda. Bethenny knows she’s on the outs but also she can see Dorinda self-destructing and has fully pounced on it. Her fixation on Dorinda is getting a bit tiresome for me, but that just might be my general Bethenny fatigue. Lay off judging Dorinda’s drinking/anger issues, you’re a hot mess who really shouldn’t be throwing stones. You both torch relationships in your own unique ways.

I’m honestly kind of dreading the reunion because based on the preview clips, the rumours about Bethenny wiping the floor with everyone just might be true. Let’s brace ourselves for the bloodbath.

16 thoughts on “Highs and Lows: Life is a Cabaret – RHONY

  1. Anyone who isn’t willing to admit that they’ve been the Dorinda at an event, absolutely fuming at someone, resolving to leave and not bring it up, then swerving back despite themselves (fresh drink in hand) to go on the warpath anyway, is no friend of mine.

    1. Oh and fuck Andy “Kellyanne Conway should be a Housewife but Omarosa definitely shouldn’t For Reasons” Cohen in advance if he serves as backup for Bethenny in the reunion. You’re not a Housewife sweetie pipe down.

  2. “No! NO! I DONT WANNA TALK ABOUT IT! It was a lovely show, you look amazing, I had a great time, and thank you for inviting Scott and not John.”

    And yes I think I underestimated the fact that Bethenny is a reunion savant and is somehow gonna leave this season victorious :/

    1. Yeah the reunion is really Bethenny’s strong suit. Being loud and able to talk 100 miles a minute is such an asset, even if you’re speaking nonsense and lies. Between that and Carole’s departure it’s definitely putting a bit of a damper on a season I really enjoyed. I like the darker, more real disintegration of relationships.

  3. As much as I love all the correct people, they’ve fumbled this season in nearly every episode. I’m dreading the reunion as well.

    1. That’s what’s so frustrating. They are all in the right as a baseline level. They have the moral leg up, but it doesn’t matter. It looks petty. Bethenny is a master at RTV manipulation, she’s planned it this way. It looks like people are just whining at her about marathon baskets and nutcrackers, and not the legitimate issues with her negative, gaslighting personality.

  4. How many housewives has Andy Cohen told to stay in their seat at reunion and not jump up? Plenty, including, most famously, Teresa Giudice. And yet Bethenny can leap across the other couch to BOOYAH her cell phone within an inch of Carole’s face. Andy is literally beaming throughout. Bethenny is lucky Carole isn’t Dorinda, otherwise that phone would be halfway up her notoriously constipated posterior.

    Yep, I’m totally dreading reunion, the softball questions, the editing to make Bethenny appear magnificent. I only hope Carole lays in one last scorching parting shot.

    1. I didn’t realize that “angry drunk seething through cheesy cabaret music” was my aesthetic but here we are

  5. I could not stop cackling at Dorinda’s expressions during Lu’s show. Made the episode for me.

    This episode really hit home for me with how much I will miss Carole. I started watching NYC with S6 (bad starting point, I know) so since then I have been seeing her navigate throughout her tenure on the show in real time. Her S8 showcase was mostly a boot but gosh, I loved her energy. This season in particular has been arguably her best yet? NYC just won’t be the same without her.

    I know the BW is anti-B but IDK, I enjoy her cuntiness during reunions. What I don’t like is Andy being her ally when he is meant to be neutral. She excels at reunions Cohen, she does NOT need back up.

    1. More than I like Carole herself (though I like her a lot!) I like her arc, and this last season of hers is about as good a definitive and narratively satisfying one as a departing Housewife could get (well notwithstanding Gretchen being flushed down the toilet back to hell ofc).

  6. Still holding out hope for the reunion – the trailer as a whole was surprisingly sparse for a 3-parter! It was all clips of “Bethenny owning” and one random inclusion of Tinsley relaying that Scott sees other people during breaks.

    I don’t think we saw the best that Carole and Dorinda have to give even in the extended previews… especially if it’s just 3 hours of everyone coming at Bethenny.

    Wishful thinking, I’m sure, but my fingers are crossed.

    1. So sorry to double post, but there’s a new preview as of Thursday, including Carole shouting that Andy’s full of shit. This’ll be fascinating!

    2. I appreciate the positive thinking and hope you’re right! There is more than enough material to drag Bethenny with this season, even long time fans of hers seemed to notice a lot of the bad behavior. Hopefully they get some real digs in.

  7. I’ve never wanted to be wrong more than when I felt Bethenny winning the reunion and getting the last word months ago. Thank God I start law school on Monday so I have an excuse to skip these reunions (my first time missing a New York reunion in 10 long years).

    Also, Messy Carole is a major mood.

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