💫STAR SEARCH💫: The Real Housewives of Potomac, S03E15

I wish y’all could have seen my face when I realized this would be To Be Continued AGAIN.

Gizelle

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The good? Her low-level undermining of and carping at Karen all episode. The bad? That ninja shit with Mo. I don’t know if anyone else feels this, but Mo vs. Gizelle has always felt very Globetrotters vs. Generals to me. When has Gizelle ever won an argument against Monique? Against anyone?

Rating: ⭐⭐ –  Oh and I fucking LIIIVED for the editors ravaging Gizelle’s lying-liar lies about the group leaving without Robyn.

Karen

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Gizelle, Karen can’t just buy a perfume machine to put in her living room; it’s not clear that she even has a living room at the moment. Oh also *this just in* but as I screencapped the above image I died laughing at Karen *immediately* slapping on a disingenuous smile as she emerged from the hotel lobby and saw a camera up in her face.

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐ –  That absurd Karen witch cackle re: Charrisse bringing Kyndall around is my new ringtone, thank you and goodnight.

Monique

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Did we all see how Monique compleeetely shifted responsibility for the Kyndall mess onto Charrisse with nary a blink of the eye? Did we?! Yes I know Gizelle’s still on her about it but (a) Gizelle will always have it out for the younger, prettier, richer, in-an-actual-relationship Monique, and (b) as if she’s gonna make that shit stick come on.

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐ –  Loved the editors’ shady shots of Mo downing that cab.

Robyn

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Still less relevant than Friend Of Charrisse, still a Gizelle appendage, Christ I mean I don’t know do I literally have to write something about her every week?

Rating: ⭐ –  If Robyn and Gizelle think anyone on this planet cares about their little walk along the beach…

Ashley

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Now this is what Ashley Darby was born to do. I have no idea how the fuck she accesses the full fucking Wikipedia of Potomac gossip and back-biting but I appreciate her vigilant curation of it.

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐ –  Honestly though you could probably stage an entire one-act with Ashley leaning bored in a chair lobbing accusations at a wildly gesticulating, shoddily wigged Kurn Hugr. Bring this shit to Broadway ASAP!

Candiace

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Have I not always said that Candiace is insane? Sure, she’s the bottom of the totem pole now. Give her a couple of seasons to rise through the ranks by default, though, and suddenly you’ve got a Sonja Tremont Morgan on your hands, and at that point WATCH OUT WORLD.

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐ –  I want to use this space to highlight Candiace’s excellent talking heads. “The white people are staring at us!” is instantly iconic.

3 thoughts on “💫STAR SEARCH💫: The Real Housewives of Potomac, S03E15

  1. Candy-ass earned her place this episode. I also love her friendship with Karen — driving her nuts with her singing, and Karen giving her the advice she needs, not the coddling she seeks.

    Karen is just 1000 shades of meta perfection. Gizelle is a horror show. I am waiting for Monique to stop indulging her and instead hand her a ticket for the next flight home.

    1. Oh I was dyyying for Mo to dismiss her back to Maryland. You’ve done it before girl why not! Half the fun of being in the Potomac cast is getting to kick Gizelle Bryant out of events, after all.

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