Friday night news dump alert! We’re getting our first rumors of how the expected RHOA reshuffle is taking shape, and it’s not beginning with the usual suspects.
- Kim Zolciak, in infinitely less surprising news, has fucked up her repeaching chances with her mess of a performance this season (looks like she’ll have to sell that Brielle sex tape after all);
- Kenya has hustled herself an against-God’s-plan eleventh season with her pregnancy and husband’s newfound willingness to film, which I’m sure are completely sincere and real things that exist in our universe;
- Eva could yet secure a peach for herself, something we decade-plus fans of the Diva are very much rooting for;
- And Kandi, NeNe, Cynthia(!), and Porsha(!!!) have all easily secured new contracts. What a world.