This week on RHOBH Erika and Lisa Rinna are off in Japan chaperoning the model girls and eating gross foodstuffs. LVP hosts a lunch and Kyle throws a party in the dark. How will I get my (trigger warning) lifestyle porn when there’s no power??? Let’s see if I survive the loss.
1. Dorit disaster. How could we possibly survive this season without Dorit? She was on such a disastrous roll this episode. First the continued Lisa Rinna shittalking at LVP’s lunch, again completely unable to discern that Teddi is not on the team yet. Then her diva antics about her photoshoot at Beverly Hills Lifestyle (which should sound familiar to you OC/Lydia McLaughlin fans) were totally over the top. I mean, yes that photoshoot was ridiculous but I don’t think you should be jeopardizing any potential income sources, Kemsley. Of course the real Dorit display took place at Kyle’s awful dinner party. First of all, her outfit was a lace bodysuit and an Axl Rose lace headband for all the Dorit fashion stans. Relatably though, Dorit hated the hot party sans AC and decided to loudly complain about everything then get drunk and call someone a cunt. Same, girl.
2. Blowjob literature. Um, how had I never heard of this Lisa Rinna book before? Definitely just shot up to the top of my housewife reading list. I’m not a big fan of the Hamlinna kids but I definitely appreciated the blonde one matter of factly telling Lisa she learned how to suck dick from her. Own it, baby.
1. Proud Mommy 2.0. I’m a big Rinna fan but I hate every minute of the momager storyline with her kids. I enjoyed Gigi much more. I think Amelia and the other one are just such teenagers and I’m not into that on my screen. All of Japan was pretty boring, actually. I like Erika and Rinna together but the trip was a non-event. You’re not that old, Erika. I don’t get Youtube either and I’m a millennial.
2. Teddi footage. Unsurprisingly, Teddi’s solo footage is incredibly dull. She does active things with her family! She’s obsessed with her kids having loving parents! Snooze. Count me down to a divorce, thanks.
Next week’s preview shows Rinna back in the mix and coming straight for LVP. Can’t wait for perhaps the first thing to happen this season on RHOBH.